Fuming
It's been two years now. Grandma lives with us now 24/7 and so does her Alzheimer's Disease. It's not an easy task living with her. I say task, because it takes a lot of work and understanding. I have mixed feelings about it. I'm sad for her, sad for us and scared at the same time. And those feelings they show up as something else - I get angry most often. Sometimes she remembers that uncle, her son, has passed away. But other times she's confused - she'd say he had died and then say that she's waiting for him to come home after work. She makes a lot of conflicting statements and these most often irritate and annoy the hell out of me. And again, I get mad. I think my Mom gets scared of me when I get angry. I get scared of me. I find myself irritated by the smallest of things - grandma related or not. I would shout because I need to release the anger. But the problem is the anger does not go away even if you shout it out. I only get angrier. Then I cry...